So- every time photos of mine end up on the front page of Deviantart, I prepare myself for the storm.
The majority of people are decent. Maybe a bit too sexual for my personal taste- but I know they mean it as a compliment so it's alright, and I know no matter what I do, it is seen as being sexual by many based purely on my physical shape, so I do understand that the talk comes with the job...
I get a few people who are amazing. Telling me how well I did with the cosplay- or the lighting- or the make up.
I get a few people telling me that I inspire them- being proud of my body whilst still being plus sized...
THEN I get the haters. So help me- the haters still get to me you guys. I can take dumb trolling statements like "fat whore" or "Man the Harpoons" because that shit doesn't matter. But when someone actually seems intelligent or like they are probably a nice person, tears me apart for something they don't understand, it really genuinely hurts me.
So many people like to question my health. Firstly- why does that matter to them? It's not like they run up to every smoker or person driving a motorcycle and scream at how dangerous their life is. BUT THEY ARE ALSO JUST ENTIRELY WRONG. I work out- I am fit- My heart rate, blood pressure, chemical balances (except my brain sucks at producing serotonin.), physical strength... THEY ARE ALL VERY GOOD. Like- far beyond the average person, especially given that our generation spends so much time sitting on it's arse.
I just... It hurts me when people look at me and think they have an excuse to insult me because they decide I am unhealthy, and they can hide their insulting body prejudices behind being "health conscious" or whatever.
I know that no matter how I looked- people would find an excuse to judge me- but it's just so genuinely tough to still have people harping on about weight issues. Like- I'M NOT EVEN REMOTELY SORRY TO HAVE THIS BODY- IT'S A GREAT BODY- It's amazingly strong, and beautiful as far as I'm concerned. I heal quickly- don't get ill often...
But when someone starts with their negative body shaming lectures about health and fitness- I feel like I'm a ten year old again, hiding under the back stairs to the library at school- just hoping people aren't going to talk to me this lunch session so I don't have to deal with their prejudices and hatred towards anything different.
Why don't some people ever fucking grow up? T_T